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In which I want one night with no gang rape
I was going to do a top five list of improbable things I want for Christmas and then I realised that they're all dirty. I need a perverts-only LJ filter, y/y? XD
Real point of this entry: a very early FRIVOLOUS PLOTS FRIDAY!
I don't know if this is an actual THING, but![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
lemniciate said I should do it again and, by darn, she gets what she wants!
For those who don't remember, the premise is simple: post those silly, corny, pointless fic ideas you know you'll never write or prompt.
Last time on FPF
This week we venture into the world of crack. I've had this ridiculous idea for months, I think Julia,rayslady, and I even talked about it on AIM once, where, one night, Colin's angsting away in Katie's room after a lover's tiff with Bradley earlier that day (IDK about what, let's just say it's their day off and Bradley wanted to go out for the day and Colin wanted to stay home), only he thinks it's a proper fight, like he and Bradley are almost broken up. And he's like, "Katie, I think it's over, we've never fought like this before, he hates me, I know he does" and Katie is all "what makes you say that?" And Colin gives these ridiculous reasons, like, "he brought dinner home tonight. AND HE DIDN'T PICK THE CHEESE SQUARES OUT OF MY SALAD FOR ME :((((" and "when he had tea this morning HE DIDN'T EVEN REFILL THE KETTLE :((((" and Katie is justifiably like "1) OMG STFU, you had a MILD DISAGREEMENT and 2) you two have some FUCKED UP co-dependency issues. Now kindly GTFO of my room and make up with him before I put my foot up your arse".
Meanwhile, across the hall in Angel's room, Bradley's like "Angel, I think it's over, we've never fought like this before, he hates me, I know he does" and also, "can I have some of that pie, I'm hungry" because he gets hungry when his LIFE IS OVER, OKAY, ANGEL? And Angel is all "what makes you say that?" and also "no, no pie for you, you will GET FAT if you keep eating your feelings". And Bradley gives reasons just as ridiculous as Colin's, like, "I said I was going out this morning and he didn't even offer to IRON MY SHIRT like usual :((((" and "when I went to brush my teeth, HE HADN'T LEFT ME A TOOTHPASTE SMILEY FACE on the mirror :((((" and Angel is justifiably like "1) OMG STFU, that is not even a fight and 2) you two are so cutesy I want stab a pencil through my eye. Now kindly vacate the room and make up with him before I knee you in the nuts".
So Bradley leaves at the exact same time Colin leaves and they kind of stand there in the hall for an awkward moment before heading back to their room silently. And then this exchange happens:
C: You don't have to share the bed with me, I'll take the couch tonight.
B: It's technically your room, so the bed is yours.
C: No, I'll take the couch, I know your shoulder gets sore.
B: No, it's okay, I was going for a run in the morning, I don't want to wake you, have the bed.
C: Well I wasn't going to bed yet and the TV will only disburb you, so you'd be better off in the bedroom actually.
B: [angrily] YOU GET HEADACHES FROM INCORRECT NECK PLACEMENT WHEN YOU SLEEP ON THE COUCH, SO THAT'S THAT, I'M HAVING THE COUCH.
C: [angrily] AND YOU'VE HAD THE FLU RECENTLY, YOU NEED TO BE RUGGED UP PROPER WARM IN BED, SO I'M HAVING THE COUCH.
[a seconds worth of heavy, angry breathing before they suddenly fall into each other's arms, smothering kisses everywhere.]
B: Oh my God, I'm so sorry, Col, I'm so sorry. I love you, I love you. I'm so sorry I made you pick the cheese out of your salad yourself!
C: No, I'M sorry, Bradley. God, I love you so much, please, please forgive me for not drawing you a smiley face in toothpaste!
B: I thought I'd lost you forever.
C: You'll never lose me, Bradley. Never ever.
[FADE TO DISGUSTINGLY SAPPY SEXY TIMES]
IDEK WHERE THESE THOUGHTS COME FROM, GUYS. THEY JUST APPEAR.
Real point of this entry: a very early FRIVOLOUS PLOTS FRIDAY!
I don't know if this is an actual THING, but
lemniciate said I should do it again and, by darn, she gets what she wants!For those who don't remember, the premise is simple: post those silly, corny, pointless fic ideas you know you'll never write or prompt.
Last time on FPF
This week we venture into the world of crack. I've had this ridiculous idea for months, I think Julia,
rayslady, and I even talked about it on AIM once, where, one night, Colin's angsting away in Katie's room after a lover's tiff with Bradley earlier that day (IDK about what, let's just say it's their day off and Bradley wanted to go out for the day and Colin wanted to stay home), only he thinks it's a proper fight, like he and Bradley are almost broken up. And he's like, "Katie, I think it's over, we've never fought like this before, he hates me, I know he does" and Katie is all "what makes you say that?" And Colin gives these ridiculous reasons, like, "he brought dinner home tonight. AND HE DIDN'T PICK THE CHEESE SQUARES OUT OF MY SALAD FOR ME :((((" and "when he had tea this morning HE DIDN'T EVEN REFILL THE KETTLE :((((" and Katie is justifiably like "1) OMG STFU, you had a MILD DISAGREEMENT and 2) you two have some FUCKED UP co-dependency issues. Now kindly GTFO of my room and make up with him before I put my foot up your arse".Meanwhile, across the hall in Angel's room, Bradley's like "Angel, I think it's over, we've never fought like this before, he hates me, I know he does" and also, "can I have some of that pie, I'm hungry" because he gets hungry when his LIFE IS OVER, OKAY, ANGEL? And Angel is all "what makes you say that?" and also "no, no pie for you, you will GET FAT if you keep eating your feelings". And Bradley gives reasons just as ridiculous as Colin's, like, "I said I was going out this morning and he didn't even offer to IRON MY SHIRT like usual :((((" and "when I went to brush my teeth, HE HADN'T LEFT ME A TOOTHPASTE SMILEY FACE on the mirror :((((" and Angel is justifiably like "1) OMG STFU, that is not even a fight and 2) you two are so cutesy I want stab a pencil through my eye. Now kindly vacate the room and make up with him before I knee you in the nuts".
So Bradley leaves at the exact same time Colin leaves and they kind of stand there in the hall for an awkward moment before heading back to their room silently. And then this exchange happens:
C: You don't have to share the bed with me, I'll take the couch tonight.
B: It's technically your room, so the bed is yours.
C: No, I'll take the couch, I know your shoulder gets sore.
B: No, it's okay, I was going for a run in the morning, I don't want to wake you, have the bed.
C: Well I wasn't going to bed yet and the TV will only disburb you, so you'd be better off in the bedroom actually.
B: [angrily] YOU GET HEADACHES FROM INCORRECT NECK PLACEMENT WHEN YOU SLEEP ON THE COUCH, SO THAT'S THAT, I'M HAVING THE COUCH.
C: [angrily] AND YOU'VE HAD THE FLU RECENTLY, YOU NEED TO BE RUGGED UP PROPER WARM IN BED, SO I'M HAVING THE COUCH.
[a seconds worth of heavy, angry breathing before they suddenly fall into each other's arms, smothering kisses everywhere.]
B: Oh my God, I'm so sorry, Col, I'm so sorry. I love you, I love you. I'm so sorry I made you pick the cheese out of your salad yourself!
C: No, I'M sorry, Bradley. God, I love you so much, please, please forgive me for not drawing you a smiley face in toothpaste!
B: I thought I'd lost you forever.
C: You'll never lose me, Bradley. Never ever.
[FADE TO DISGUSTINGLY SAPPY SEXY TIMES]
IDEK WHERE THESE THOUGHTS COME FROM, GUYS. THEY JUST APPEAR.
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(I volunteer myself for that filter. By which I mean PUT ME ON IT IMMEDIATELY WOMAN)
okay I've lots of laundry that needs doing so I'll simply say this for now:
"can I have some of that pie, I'm hungry"
THIS IS BASICALLY HOW I IMAGINE BRADLEY TO RESPOND IN ANY AND ALL CRISES. HE GOES FOR THE PIE AND NOMS
WHILE COLIN SAVES THE DAY. CANON. <3333no subject
YESSSS, PIE IS CANON FOREVER.
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ALSO, I LOVE HOW KATIE AND ANGEL ARE SO UNITED AGAINST THE FAIL OF THE BOYS. LIKE, AT SOME POINT THEY REALLY DESERVE A BIG REWARD FOR PUTTING UP WITH THEIR CO-DEPENDENT WAYS.
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WHAT'S YOUR FRIVOLOUS PLOT FOR TODAY THEN?
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I hope you've had SO MUCH yum food.
MY FRIVOLOUS PLOT WOULD INVOLVE MERLIN AND ARTHUR IN A COFFEE SHOP, MAKING OUT OVER THE COUNTERS AND DOING UNSPEAKABLE THINGS WITH THE WHIPPED CREAM. KLJFDHG when I have more time (aka when I'm not wrapping presents, omg why did I leave it all this late klsjfhgjkhdfg) I WILL ELABORATE MORE ON THIS.
for now, have a wonderful Christmas!
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Mmm. MMM. I very much like this coffee shop idea and would like to subscribe to your newsletter please *_* I LOOK FORWARD TO HEARING MORE ABOUT THIS AT A LATER DATE, PARTICULARLY THE PART ABOUT WHIPPED CREAM. You should also know that now I'm going to be thinking inappropriate things while I'm whipping the cream for the trifle tomorrow. I AM OKAY WITH THIS THOUGH XD
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The best part of FPF is that you've practically written the whole story in a very concise manner so we all get free perverted fic. This is a good plan. ;)
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I wish more people would contribute to FPF though, this is just a big old wank fest for meee at the moment XD
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NOW.
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Or not :D EITHER WAY I STILL HAVE A MASSIVE BONER FOR YOU
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I HOPE YOU HAVE A WONDERFUL CHRISTMAS, MY DEAR!
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I HOPE YOU HAVE AN EQUALLY WONDERFUL ONE AS WELL, BB!
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I WOULD EXPECT NOTHING LESS FROM YOU!
And if you do make that filter OF COURSE I WANT TO BE ON IT!
IDEK WHERE THESE THOUGHTS COME FROM, GUYS. THEY JUST APPEAR
Too much porn (though I personally believe there is no such thing) and schmoopy Bradley/Colin fic (again, no such thing)?
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You're right, there is absolutely NO SUCH THING as too much porn or schmoopy boys, though if these was, I would technically be overdosing right now xD
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THERE SHOULD BE MORE WHERE IS IT?? :O
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And you using that embarrassment tag will forever give me old man pleasure. ;_;
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