THIS IS WHY MERLIN FANDOM IS THE BEST:


(From this tumblr)

On a note unrelated to kitty!Colin (I promise), I'm creating a filter for pervy thoughts, do you want to be on it? So instead of talking about how much I want to bang Colin Morgan in the same entry as something G rated, the banging talk will be in another entry. IDK, it just means I don't have to watch what I say quite so much. I'm only going to ask once, so click yes if you want to be on the filter or ignore the poll if you don't.

PS: NC-17 fic will remain and always be public though, jsyk.

PPS: ALLISON AND JENN, YOU'RE ALREADY ON IT.

[Poll #1661383]
I was going to do a top five list of improbable things I want for Christmas and then I realised that they're all dirty. I need a perverts-only LJ filter, y/y? XD

Real point of this entry: a very early FRIVOLOUS PLOTS FRIDAY! )
You know what I am wondering, Merlin fandom? Do you?

WHERE'S THE RPF IN RELATION TO THE PICS OF PANTY MELTING DOOM? I mean, we got knights orgies which is all well and good, but WHERE'S COLIN SALIVATING AT ALL THE MAN CANDY?

WHERE'S BRADLEY DICKING AROUND AND COLIN TAKING THE PISS, HAVING A RIGHT OLD LAUGH AT BEING TOLD TO ACT SEXY FOR THE CAMERA?

WHERE'S COLIN, EYES DARKENING WITH LUST AS HE WATCHES HIS BOYFRIEND FROM BEHIND THE CAMERA AND BRADLEY, SKIN TINGLING AT THE TENSION THAT'S BEEN CRACKLING BETWEEN THEM ALL AFTERNOON?

WHERE'S THE AWKWARD TITTERING OF SEVEN MEN WHO DON'T QUITE KNOW WHAT TO DO WHEN THEY FIND THEMSELVES INEXPLICABLY TURNED ON BY THE SENSE OF CAMARADERIE AND CLOSENESS THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO BE PORTRAYING?

(Have orgies been done in Merlin rps or is that crossing a moral boundary?

...is it sad I need moral boundaries explained to me?)

WHERE IS THE FIC, GUYS?

This post brought to you by 6am and sleep deprivation.
Random entry of randomness because I'm trying to keep myself awake for a few more hours.

Mrs. Krabappel and Principal Skinner were in the closet making babies and I saw one of the babies and then the baby looked at me. )
Hey everyone, it's Frivolous Plots Friday! Or; it's Friday and I happen to feel like sharing the plotty madness that sometimes goes through my head, let's make a thing of it! Sounds like fun, right, Merlin?



Shut up, Merlin.

Cheesy trope, I want you so hard )

And that's that. What about you guys? Do you ever come up with fic ideas you know are ridiculous or corny but that you can't help but want?
Woke up at 2am from two hours of sleep and decided that I had to find an outfit for this weekend's wedding RIGHT THEN. Eventually found one and then thought, 'meh, what the heck' and decided to clean the kitchens and bathrooms from top to bottom.

It's now 6am and I'm feeling like a pretty accomplished motherfucking boss but it's also possible I'm just delirious from the spicy combination of cleaning product fumes and a lack of sleep.

I think I'll make a meringue next, that seems to be the next logical step.

HI GUYS HI.


(Advice Merlin)
HI HI HI. Home until Friday. I have zero to say but hi anyway. Thus far, my hiatus has yielded the meaningful, substantial and existential enlightenment one would expect, for example:

a) Baking a cake is far more rewarding at 2am, than at any other time.

b) If I had to experience dirty fic in audiobook form, I would want Nigella Lawson as the narrator.

c) I only exist as body heat for the dog to warm herself by of an evening.

d) I Know What You Did Last Summer remains a terrible, terrible film after all these years. Jsyk. Oh Freddie Prinze Jr., it hurts deep in my soul when you try to form an expression.

And that's that. Life-affirming, I know.
Housesitting officially starts today, eight weeks baby! Though I'll be fairly evenly spread between my aunt's house and my own by the sound of it, like next week when I'm home for the entire working week, but just a heads up anyway. The house has a computer and all but I'll most likely only be using my iPod, so you'll either not hear very much from me in the way of comments because typing on the iPod is fucking hard labour, or you'll be hearing a little too much from me because there is shit-all to do. Apologies in advance for both instances.

ONE YEAR SMOKE FREE! I'd been smoking since 2000 and never actually thought I could quit successfully, at the most I think I was just hoping to cut down, but pfft, it was so much easier than I'd ever imagined. I should go create a tumblr called fuck yeah me, because seriously. FUCK YEAH ME!

Ever since I posted that Men In Tights gif the other day, I've been mentally casting Merlin characters into that film, mostly, if I'm honest, because I want to see Leon as Little John (Don't let my name fool you. In real life, I'm veeeery big). And if we were going for the slash version, which, come on, it's ME, of course we are; Arthur would have to be Robin Hood because he's blonde and dashing (and unlike some other Robin Hoods, he can speak with an English accent); which means Merlin would be Maid Marian (I must warn you - it could only be a kiss. For I am a virgin and could never...go all the way. Unless I were married. Or if a man pledged his endless love to me. Or if I knew that he desperately cared for me. Or if he were really cute!) and Gaius would be his maidservant, Broomhilde, who's always cockblocking Marian!Merlin (NO DING DING WITHOUT A WEDDING RING). Lancelot would of course be Will Scarlet because of the HAIR and Gawain would be Achoo because I suspect he's snarky and I never really got around to casting the girls but I suppose Morgana could be the witch, Latrine (Raven's egg, blood of a hen! A little more blood, yes! Eyeballs of a crocodile, testicles of a newt...I guess he's a transsexual now.) which OH OH OH means Alvarr could be the Sheriff of Rottingham because Latrine!Morgana totes has a thing for him and he already has the beard going on. So Gwen could be...Blinkin? IDK IDK, holes, but ahhh. The things that amuse my mind.

A very, very early happy birthday to [livejournal.com profile] paenteom because I won't be here on the actual day. I hope you have a fabulous time, sweetheart!

And, er, that's it I think. Stay safe kiddies! TWOISH MORE WEEKS UNTIL NEW MERLIN, EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
So, erm, I posted an entry last night around dawn o'clock and then sometime in the following six hours I woke up from my slumber and deleted it for no memorable reason. And I mean that quite literally, I cannot remember why on earth I'd bother. No alcohol was involved in the decision making process, I'm fairly certain. It just appears no conscious brain power was involved either.
All this rain must be messing with my brain because I'm actually considering writing for the It Happened One Night prompt over at [livejournal.com profile] reel_merlin. WHAT AM I DOING? I can't write! I never finish things! This is a really bad idea!

And yet I am watching the movie and taking notes right now.

This is ridiculous.

In related news, mmm, Clark Gable.

EDIT: Ack, no, I can't do it. Sanity has prevailed.
Oh shit, shit, shit, I wrote porn. Almost 2000 words of it, which is a record for me. RPS, no less! And it's kinky too. For shame, me, for shame.

Title: Haven't thought of one but in my head it is the Porny of the Apocalypse.
Rating: NC-17, so hard
Warnings: RPF, bdsm, IDEK
Pairing/s: Katie/Bradley/Colin
Word count: Just under 2000 I think?

Read it here, oh god, I'm so ashamed. )
Vampire Weekend Video to Star RZA, Jake Gyllenhaal, Lil Jon, Jonas Brother

Firstly, whaaaaat?

Secondly, OMG RZA & Jake Gyllenhaal <3

Thirdly, LOL "Jonas Brother"

Fourthly, is fourthly actually a word?

Fifthly (...), I am ridiculously excited for this!
Storms a brewin'. Yup. *Spits tobacco*



Photo meme requests, part the second )
Photo meme requests )
Do you want to know what happens when I'm made to wait for something? DIRTY THINGS, THAT'S WHAT.

Bad comment pr0n )

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